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5th February 2019
12:29pm GMT

"So my sister in law announced that her wedding (this summer)was going to be a weekend-long affair a couple of hours away from where we live. "Invitations recently went out and my husband and I were a little shocked to see that alongside RSVP info was bank details to pay £180 to secure our place at the wedding! "We will be staying over with our child on the venue grounds for 2 nights so I understand what this money will probably go towards this but I just feel it's a bit 'off' and bad etiquette. "When we got married, immediate family stayed at the venue which we paid for."
The woman added that she was unsure what the £180 was for, as her mother-in-law - and the bride's mum - was "footing a lot of the wedding bill". This included the venue hire, as well as the room hire.
She continued:
"My MIL was shocked as she is footing a lot of the wedding bill and when SIL sounded her out in this, she asked SIL not to ask for money off immediate family in this way."She explained that she and her husband would pay, as "we wouldn't want to miss it for the world," and she just wanted to know who other people would feel about this.
Many people said that they felt it was an unfair and rude request, especially since the rooms had been paid for. However, others suggested that while it was fair to ask for funds towards the accommodation, it probably could've been handled better.
In a reply to another user, the woman later added:
"We can just about afford it but it is an unexpected expense at a time when we are struggling financially as I am on mat leave.
"I guess we will just have to suck it up and pay as my husband gets on with his sister well and wouldn't want to upset her. Still feel aggrieved though. "At the end of the invitation it says to 'give generously' with regards to a wedding present. I doubt we will be doing this!"
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