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28th January 2016
03:57pm GMT
I was walking my dog round East Finchley, late, two nights ago. Chasing foxes, that kind of thing. And I heard a noise.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016I heard muffled screaming & saw the boot of a car rattling. Oh no, I thought - someone's trapped in the boot!
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016In a swift, dynamic movement I flung open the boot of the car. The boot light came on. I was staring into the face of a woman!
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016The woman was naked.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016On top of the woman was a man. Also naked.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016The woman was clinging on to the boot, rattling it while she screamed. For very different reasons than the ones I had assumed from outside.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016What does one say in that situation?
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016I'll tell you what I said. I said: "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I thought you were trapped. Like a hostage. Because of the screaming and...
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016Then I started to close the boot - carefully. I didn't want to trap anything. Unfortunately, my dog is very well trained...
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016So before I could close the boot, Harpo (my dog) did what he's been trained to do when someone opens the boot of a hatchback.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016My dog jumped into the boot. Sort of next-to (but mainly on-top-of) the faces of the two copulating strangers.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016Obviously I can't undo Harpo's training, so I said, "Good boy."
Which I think gave the wrong impression.
— Joe Craig (@joecraiguk) January 28, 2016Explore more on these topics:
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