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11th November 2025
05:28pm GMT

More people are coming out as 'nebulasexual' - here's what it means.
Coined in 2014, the term doesn’t have anything to do with space or extraterrestrials but is a sexuality that feels unclear or hard to define, often linked to neurodivergence or intrusive thoughts.
Queerdom Wiki described nebulasexuality as someone who ‘is unable to, or has a hard time distinguishing what sexual attraction is compared to other forms of attraction.’
Because it’s seen as a tertiary orientation, people may use the term to express uncertainty or complexity around their attraction, with or without adding another sexual label.
Though a newer term, psychosexual therapist Annabelle Knight told Metro it describes something long present but only recently defined.
She explained: "For many neurodivergent people, processing emotions and sensations can feel different.
"Social cues, bodily signals, or even the concept of attraction might not register in the same way as they do for neurotypical people, which can make it confusing to know whether you want someone sexually or are simply drawn to them in another way."
Knight added: "Nebulasexuality gives a name to that uncertainty – it’s not about indecision, but about navigating a more complex sensory and emotional landscape."
Neurodivergent conditions such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) can impact someone's social experiences as well as physical touch, potentially leading to challenges in relationships.
Research shows neurodivergent people are far more likely to identify as asexual or experience non-heterosexual attraction compared to neurotypical individuals.
Knight highlighted that neurodivergent people ‘might find it hard to communicate their desires or feel pressure to 'define' their sexuality when it doesn’t fit neatly into labels like straight, gay, or asexual,’ which may ‘lead to self-doubt or anxiety about intimacy.’
However, noted the importance of remembering that 'sexuality can be fluid and that not everyone experiences attraction in a linear or predictable way.’
"Some people who identify as nebulasexual might gain more clarity over time, while others may always experience attraction in a more abstract or shifting way – and both are completely valid," she said.
Neurodivergent individuals who struggle to understand their desires may identify as nebulasexual, though personal definitions vary.
In relationships, patience and open communication are essential, whether you or your partner are clear about your identity or not.
"It can also help to speak with a professional who understands neurodiversity and can support you in understanding your boundaries and preferences," she concluded.
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