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21st December 2016
03:37pm GMT
Thinking that her son would witness the mess and freak out or own up, Lynn got the worst surprise when she woke up the next morning:
"Miles woke up before me and went to the bathroom and apparently got scared shitless that he was going to be in so much trouble that he needed to cover his tracks. Soooo my son, apple of my eye, the monster I was on bed rest for 5 months for, that I went through 21 hours of labor for and took 3 hours to push his huge ass head out, well he decides to frame the elf. "So he gets a magic marker, black to be exact and draws squiggly lines all over my bathroom walls. Yes you read that shit right. Then writes a note with the said marker saying, "You are ugly Lynn" and then the mastermind puts the marker on the elf. "I have to give him credit there, he is smarter than some of the dumb asses on Snapped or I Almost Got Away With It. Kind of scary if I think about that. Anyway so now because of this Mother F%^$%$& elf I have to paint my bathroom again. I mean how can I yell at him without telling him I know he did it b/c I did the shaving cream. So to whomever the friggin genius was that came up with Elf on a Shelf, you're an asshole and I hope the elf murders you in your sleep!"
Luckily for Lynn, the marker came off with soap and water but surely her son Miles deserves a medal for his quick-thinking ways.
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