You REALLY don't want to get on the wrong side of this guy.

Jay Rayner is a world famous food critic and he's known for his honest interpretation of some of the most coveted cuisines the world has to offer. He's also brutally honest and you don't want to p*** him off. Which judging by the review he wrote in the Guardian, this restaurant did. So the meal for two in Le Cinq, came to €600 including service charge and 'modest' wine... I'm not sure what modest wine means but whatever way you want to look at it, that is NOT CHEAP. We should mention that the restaurant has 3 Michelin stars and is located in the Four Seasons Hotel in Paris (understanding the price a little better). I'll just give you a short insight into what the famous critic thought of the food, here's the first paragraph,

"There is only one thing worse than being served a terrible meal: being served a terrible meal by earnest waiters who have no idea just how awful the things they are doing to you are",

Ouch! I would love to say the brutality ended here, but alas it continued. When describing a canape Mr.Rayner's companion winced,

"It’s like eating a condom that’s been left lying about in a dusty greengrocer’s,"

When describing the room,

"It is decorated in various shades of taupe, biscuit and f**k you."

When describing an amuse-bouche,

"My lips purse, like a cat’s arse that’s brushed against nettles."

You can imagine... he didn't enjoy the meal, you can read the full review here. Aside from terrifying us to our core, Jay Rayner is also an accomplished jazz musician. If we ever meet him, you can be full sure we'll be inviting him around for a jam session and NOT a meal.