Celebrity

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9th September 2013
02:35pm BST

We have noticed that celebrity pregnancies aren’t like normal pregnancies. While we’d be throwing on the tracksuit bottoms, avoiding cameras and keeping the details to ourselves, the famous don’t.
In fact celebrity pregnancies seem to all follow a similar and somewhat surreal pattern which we have formed into a set of rules...
1. Deny it profusely
Under no circumstances are they allowed to admit they are pregnant. We realise that most are waiting until the first three months are over but sometimes the baby is here before an announcement is made!
2. Hold your tummy on the red carpet
It just has to be done.
3. Announce it on Twitter (preferably with a sonogram snap)
Sonogram pictures are the latest trend among pregnant stars and while they might think they’re being clever and subtle, we think it’s a bit weird. It is, after all, a picture of their abdomen.

4. Reveal one detail every couple of months
Oh, they can never give too much away. If they reveal they are pregnant, they have to delay the sex or if they announce the birth, the name should come at least a couple of hours later. It’s a wonder they ever get anything done.
5. Put a picture of the bump on Instagram
Much like holding the bump, showing off the bump is also a must.
6. Make a big deal of the first picture
Will it be on their social media account? Or perhaps they will agree to a magazine deal? Just hurry up and show us the child please!
7. Continue to wear uncomfortable clothes
Like we said, we’d be living in tracksuit bottoms and Uggs. They however opt for skin-tight dresses and high heels.

8. Have at least two baby showers
Okay, so Fergie was the only one to do this but a celebrity baby shower is always a big deal with, at least, a star-studded guest list and a three-course lunch menu.
9. Post pictures of presents and/or nursery
Designer baby wear, the perfect nursery – it’s all there on Instagram.